Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Confessions of a Shopaholic...You Betta Check Yo'self...

I need a break

After the stress of buying a home,
Deciding to, then actually going through with surgery,
Dealing with 2 teenage daughters that are pushing us to the limits

I need a break
Even if just for one day

That’s it, I decide, I’m booking an overnight trip
Just me and The Hubby

A L O N E time
We’re outta here

I check out a few different online websites for current deals in our area
I decide he we could drive an hour or two-
just to get away
After all we are in SoCal,
there are so many local places that people spend their life savings to visit

There’s just one problem- I’m cheap, very cheap
I want things,
but the thought of actually spending my hard earned dollar bills makes me nauseous
I’ve got credit cards to pay off
The kids will surely need things
The cars could require maintenance
And then good ol’ Mr. Murphy could come enforce law at the most impromptu time

It’s just one night,
I need a break
I remind myself

I decide to try William Shatners Pricebreaker deals,
I mean with karate chops and kicks like that,
the big ol’ bodyguard of his standing by,
He must have the best deals

Click, click, click
Nothing good enough, nothing cheap enough

Click, click, click
“Name your own price”, well that’s intriguing
Heck, I’ll give it a shot
I check what the 3 star hotels in Santa Barbara are going for $150-200+
The latest “name your own price” winner bagged their deal for $134.
I’m gonna go out on a limb and bid…

William Shatner appears on the next screen with his awesome karate moves

He’s chopping,
He’s negotiating
He’s dead…no deal for me


By the next day, I was bummed
I was frustrated
I wanted to get the heck outta Dodge

That’s it, I’m gonna offer even more today
I’m willing to spend an extra $10 this time!
Hold her back ladies and gents, we got a big time spender here!
I pull up my failed deal with the enticing “Give it another shot” lingo
And decide to increase my offer to $90.


*Please change your criteria before submitting* appears on the screen

I did, I delete it, and retype $90.00

*Please change your criteria before submitting*again

Oh, now you’re pissing me off Captain Kirk

I start clicking this and that
Un-clicking this and that
I’m making changes can’t you see Mr. Shatner, I plea

Oh yeah, here we go
He’s chopping away at my deal again
“Please wait while we are negotiating your price”
*butterflies in my belly*

Congratulations, you won the deal!!
Whoo fricken hooo!! I won the deal!!

Then the next screen appears

You’re staying at a 3star hotel in... Santa Maria

Santa Maria?
Where is Santa Maria?

I clearly clicked on Santa Barbara….didn’t i?

My inner voice says,
yeah, you did,
but you also clicked Santa Maria during your clicking fit.

Maquest quickly

Only 3 hours and 30 mins- One way!!

You betta check yo'self
before you wreck yo' quick overnight vacation!

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Now I lay me down to sleep...

As I lay my head down next to The Boy,
I wisper softly to him...
tonight is the last night Mama's gonna lay with you,
it's your last day of being 5. when you're 6 you won't need me anymore
He quickly repies, no, it's when i'm 7
Son, when you were 4, you said 5.
When you were 5, you said 6.
And now that you're gonna be 6, you say 7?
He quickly wispers back to me...I mean when I'm 10.

Follow along through the fun and agony as we try to figure out how to raise two completely opposite teenagers- Teen 1, the fiesty yet inquisitive one, Teen 2 quiet but wise-cracking and our ball full of energy known as The Boy. It aint always pretty, but we’ll sure try to make the best of it!
These are the stories of our lives…